How to Say it: Coaching Conversations

Sarah: Webinar hosting by HRDQ- U and presented by Tanya Longino. My name is Sarah and I’ll moderate the webinar today. It will be about an hour and if you have any questions you can always type them into the questions box. We’ll be getting to these questions at the end of the presentation or in an email if we do run out of time, and then also note that you can download the handouts through GoToWebinar. It’s in that handouts tab in your dashboard. If you just advance to the next slide, please. All right, perfect, thank you. Just a little insight before we start the webinar. This is the foundation of the webinar. It’s based on our product Coaching Conversations, and please stay tuned after the webinar. We’re actually doing an exclusive offer on this product, so I would like to welcome Tanya and thank you so much for joining us today.

Tanya: Thank you, Sarah, and good afternoon everyone and thank you for joining our webinar on how to say it coaching conversations. My name is Tanya Longino and I’m so excited to be with you for about the next 45 minutes or so. In our time today, the next 45 minutes, here’s what we’ll cover. We will identify the three steps to having an effective coaching conversation. We’ll learn to recognize the correct way to move a coaching conversation in the right way, and finally how do we use the coaching techniques we’ve learned for performance improvement, development, and for teaching other skills?

Tanya: This Dilbert cartoon, I think most of us are probably familiar with Dilbert, illustrates and employee manager engagement of today. You see here Ashok is receiving a very perplexing text from his manager while he’s having lunch with friends and it says, “What does this mean?” Dilbert lets him know oh, that’s a performance review. Dilbert can say this for sure because he has likely received the same sort of text in this manner from maybe his manager about his performance.

Tanya: I know this may seem a bit extreme but this is how employees today view their interactions with their managers. According to Gallup’s state of the American workplace, only one in four employees strongly agree that their manager provides meaningful feedback to them or that the feedback received really helps them do better work, and only 30% of employees strongly agree that their manager involves them in really setting their goals for their work.

Tanya: Gone are the days where employees want just a simple pat on the back or the courtesy annual performance or employee survey. It’s just not enough. Employees thrive in organizations where leaders communicate with them openly and consistently. So, how do we define coaching? We define coaching as an interaction in which one individual enables another to develop attitudes or behaviors to help them maximize their performance in their current role or future careers.

Tanya: We further define it, if we dig a little deeper here, an interaction where a manager empowers the employee. This is also an interaction that promotes improvement, growth, and advancement, and ultimately coaching is an opportunity to raise an employee’s level of performance to the highest possible level. So, why do managers then struggle with coaching and what makes it so hard? Managers say in this bubble here, “I don’t have enough time,” “My employees don’t like coaching,” “I can’t read my employee’s minds,” “It’s just really difficult to change behavior,” “I have too many other priorities on my plate, they’re all competing,” and, “We really need to work now. I don’t have time for coaching.”

Tanya: One of the most compelling and the big one that we’re going to tackle today is this one. I don’t know how to facilitate constructive coaching conversations. That’s what we’re going to work on. So, what we know for sure in organizations that foster good coaching, according to some of the surveys done by the corporate executive board, there is a direct correlation with employee retention and satisfaction and also employee commitment and adaptability. You can see here on the chart that employee retention improves by 40%, employee satisfaction by 37%. This is also when there’s good coaching being done.

Tanya: So, I invite you all to type in the chat box the answer to this question. What percentage of time do you currently spend on coaching your employees? So, just take a moment to type in that chat box. I’ll give you a moment to do that. Good. So, I see a variety of numbers here. I see 20%, I see 30, I see 10. So, while there is really no exact science to coaching or time to spend in coaching, the focus should be spent on …

Sarah: Hi, Tanya? Are you there? All right, yep, looks like you lost audio. One second, let me try to locate Tanya. She might have just got cut off. Sorry. We lost audio. She’s dialing back in now. Hi, all. Thanks for being patient. Tanya’s having some technical difficulties but she is just rebooting her GoToMeeting and then she should be back on shortly, so thanks for waiting. All right, it looks like Tanya logged back in. Tanya?

Tanya: Yes, I’m here.

Sarah: Hi.

Tanya: Hi.

Sarah: Sorry.

Tanya: I’m so sorry for what happened.

Sarah: No worries. You know how these live events go. So, let’s get the Power Point pulled up again and can you share your screen with us?

Tanya: Give me one second to pull it back up. You don’t want to see all that. It just died. Let’s see.

Tanya: Oh, goodness. And now it’s in this syncing mode here so let’s see.

Sarah: Is it just loading the Power Point?

Tanya: I think it’s loading it now. I don’t know.

Sarah: All right. Actually, let’s see. Do you want me to pull it up on my computer? Would that be easier?

Tanya: Well, yeah. Well, here it goes. All right.

Sarah: Yeah, thanks for being patient everybody on the line. You know how these live events go. You never know what can happen.

Tanya:m Okay. It’s really … Sarah, you may want to pull up yours because it’s taking a long time. It’s thinking.

Sarah: Here we go, you’re showing your screen now.

Tanya: I am but it’s just thinking.

Sarah: Alrighty, let’s see. All right, I’ll go ahead and make myself presenter. All right, can everybody see my screen?

Tanya:  All except for me, Sarah.

Sarah: Can everybody see my screen or no? All right, can you just follow along with the handouts maybe?

Tanya: Sarah, can you see me at all?

Sarah: I’m showing my Power Point right now. So, I can give you keyboard and mouse control. Can you click on the Power Point and advance the slides?

Tanya: Let’s see here. It’s really taking me through it right now. Can you see that?

Sarah: Are you seeing my screen?

Tanya: I can see your screen. I can see, okay give me one second here. Okay. Okay. So, you have up the Dilbert cartoon?

Sarah:  Correct, yes. I have state of coaching on right now.

Tanya: Okay, so can you advance? Am I live, Sarah?

Sarah: Yes, if you want to click on the Power Point with your mouse you can advance the slides.

Tanya:  Oh, good. Okay, thank you.

Sarah:Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Tanya: I’m going to … So, my apologies everyone that I had some technical difficulties so I’m just going to advance where we left off a bit. We were talking about what makes coaching do difficult and we had landed on one of the major factors being managers not really knowing how to facilitate constructive conversations and that being a space where we could spend some time in the next what we have probably 30 minutes left. I had asked you to do a little polling about how much time you spend on your coaching.

I also had asked you a little bit around effective coaching is not necessarily about the time spent but about the way and how you spend the time, that it’s effective coaching and that we use frequent touches and that we identify smart goals when we are coaching. I’m gonna go over to the next slide. I’m gonna advance a few more slides over. So, here’s what we’re gonna do. We’re gonna identify three steps of effective coaching, of an effective coaching session.

We’re gonna recognize some application for inquiry and advocacy, which is essentially just asking the right questions and again applying coaching techniques for important in performance and career development and also training for specific skills. So, let’s take the first one and identify what we find to be the three most effective in ways of coaching. So, the three steps that we want to talk about today is number one focusing on the person more than their problem. Here we’re asking for focus on the individual and if we do that then we can offer long term benefits to the employee and ultimately to the organization.

What we’re doing is helping our employees find their best fit, what makes them more productive and also satisfied, and all of this will go a long way when we’re identifying areas for opportunity and improvement. Here’s where we are asking questions to help diagnose and explore options when we want to take action, so we’re brainstorming with the employee. We’re embracing all the ideas that come through the brainstorm, and we’re exploring different areas for learning for improvement.

Tanya: We also encourage that we avoid asking those questions that suggest solutions or judgment. What we’re doing is helping the employee to determine the best ways to perform a task or providing them support. We’re encouraging them and we’re showing commitment to their success. Thank you, Sarah. We want to be very cautious of falling back on just giving feedback, and you see the illustration here. Coaching sessions should not be one way dialogues. What most of us are accustomed to is the traditional just a feedback session.

Effective coaching is a session where there’s a two way engagement as you see here in the illustration. Next slide, please. This slide says that both can happen in the same conversation. So, we agree that a manager-led reflection is good. We assess past completed projects and go over the tasks that have been completed. We discuss strengths and development opportunities, and we provide course correction if needed and give suggestions provided by the employee.

In an employee self-actualization, here’s some key indicators: We encourage the employee to lead the conversation, ask questions to encourage self-reflection and performance and we also, as the coach, we help them to identify and strategize how they’ll manage projects in the future. Reviewing performance results and acknowledging and recognizing achievements as well as opportunities for improvement is important when we’re working through and engagement process with the employee.

Focus on the person more than their problem. So, here’s where we ask that our coach remains present, that you remain intentional, and that you provide an inviting atmosphere when you’re having a coaching engagement. This gives the employee confidence that you are committed to their success. We’re incorporating a personalized approach based on the needs of the employee and their preferences, use an inquisitive and a non-judgemental tone. Employees are very intuitive, right? So, they’re listening actively and they’re watching body language so it’s important that we’re projecting positive body language and that we’re using our active listening skills.

Tanya: Asking the right questions will avoid missteps in the action plans and follow up. So, we want to ask questions that help us to discover and explore options and to take action. You want to ask questions in the performance or the coaching session that look like this: what does success look like to you? Questions that explore options. What do you think your options are? What’s within your control to change? You want questions that drive action. What is the first thing you’ll do or who will you seek out for help? Those are the types of questions that will motivate action.

So, obviously we want to avoid questions that suggest solutions or judgment. The employee should leave an engagement feeling that you are their advocate and not an adversary so we want to avoid the have you tried this? Oh, why didn’t you do this? Or how do you think you’ll get that done without a plan? Very accusatory. Use instead questions like these: what are some options that you should try? Or tell me more about what led you to… Or how will you create that plan?

So, the second step here is recognizing the correct application for inquiry and advocacy. What questions should I ask to get desired results? Do your homework first. Coaching engagements are unique to each employee and should not feel cookie cutter. Have pre-meeting preparation. It’s very important. Review your employee’s most recent metrics and other related performance, feedback, progress reports, et cetera. Identify one or two or three specific topics that you want to discuss during the conversation that’s based on their performance, and also perhaps based on an urgent need where you need to address something in a developmental area.

Seek out others who can provide you feedback. Their peers, perhaps others that they have worked with or mentors. And then finally, plan out key coaching messages you want to convey to your employee. During the discussion, there are some key activities for execution. You want to make sure that you’re keeping the employee’s preferences and their needs in mind when we begin the conversation. Talk through current performance and encourage dialog. Remember, this is a two-way engagement.

Tanya: Make sure to leave time for your employee to share their own perspective and give them some time for self-reflection on their own performance, and ask them what you think or what they think they need for guidance, and also agree on next steps. Include specific areas for focus.

During your engagement with the employee there are a few questions we’ve put here that might be good starters and encourage dialog. What strategies are working well for you that you can apply to other situations? What do you think has gotten in the way of your success? What do you think should be your next steps? And ultimately how can I support you? How will you get it done? Those are all good questions to encourage two-way conversation and dialog. Here’s another polling question, and I encourage you to use your chat box or your polling box there. What’s the most effective question here? A, B, or C?

Tanya: A, do you agree with my observation? B, what are some options that you are considering? C, why did you take X action versus action Y? Take a moment to complete this poll if you will. These are three questions, choose one of them that you think will be the most effective in a coaching session. Angie, I see your answer. Tamika. Thank you, Jonathan, Leah. Wow, good. And it looks like C, B is the correct answer. Next slide, please.

Tanya: What are some of the options that you are considering? Again, this is a question that allows the employee and giving them an opportunity for self-discovery, to realize their own success, and also to take ownership during the process of their improvement. After your conversation, what happens? After the initial coaching session we suggest immediately following up with the employee to recap your discussion to develop the plan and also to revisit the agreements that you’ve made.

Tanya: The suggestion from us is that it be within a day of your initial coaching. Record a brief summary of your coaching conversation and agreed upon next steps, provide specific plan and resources if needed to assist the employee in addressing the improvement areas, and ensure that you’re keeping track of results as you move forward and as coaching is needed. Next slide, please.

Let’s see. There we go. So, how do we apply these basic coaching techniques for performance improvement and development? Next slide. So, simply developing an action plan. We develop an action plan with the employee. We ask them what’s the takeaway from the discussion that we just had? You make sure to ask what do you need from me? And you set realistic expectations, realistic goals. Let’s set some smart goals, goals that are specific, measurable, actionable, realistic, and time bound, and let’s also agree on realistic completion dates.

Finally, committing to frequent and consistent check ins, very important. Go back one more. So, we’ve come to the end of my deck here in the presentation and we can say, hopefully, that you can now identify the steps for effective coaching, that you recognize and you can apply the right questions when you’re in your coaching sessions with your employees, and also that you now know the coaching techniques to improve performance and develop skills for your employee’s success. So, I want to open it up for a couple questions because I think we have a couple minutes, Sarah, to do that.

Sarah: Yes, we do. Attendees, go ahead and type your questions into that chat box, and Tanya if you could just advance to the next slide, please. Perfect, yeah. Tanya’s information is up there. If you have any questions for her directly you can go ahead and reach out to her. That’s her website and then also her email address. Then we’re actually offering a 25% discount off of Coaching Conversations, which was the foundation of this webinar today. Go ahead to HRDQ store dot com to purchase, and let’s see if we have any questions coming in. Let’s see. Sorry, guys, let me just go ahead and pull this down a little bit. All right, so our first question they’re asking what are the best ways to encourage staff for personal growth and improvement.

Tanya: The best ways to encourage staff for personal growth and improvement? In my experience one of the best ways to encourage growth and improvement, especially when you’re working either with teams or individuals is to start with your mission and your goals for your group, your department, for the individuals, making sure that those goals are clearly defined and that they are goals that, again, use SMART metrics around them and that you spend the time with the coaching and engagement conversations and that you’re providing tools and resources for employees to be successful. I hope that answers the question.

Sarah: Perfect. Next question looks like it’s coming from Ken and he wants to know how do we address an employee who has had a bad coaching experience in the past and is either defensive or dismissive to your coaching techniques?

Tanya: That’s a great question, Ken, and I’m sure with as many managers and coaches as we have on the line all of us have experienced that where an employee has had a bad experience with a coaching session, and I’ve always tried to start with questions and being very transparent and honest and open with your employee asking them what they saw as being, what elements of their coaching sessions or their coaching were not good for them so that you understand each employee has certain triggers or they have different needs and that’s why coaching should be tailored and not cookie cutter, as I’ve mentioned during the webinar. It’s very important that it’s unique and when an employee feels that their coaching session is unique to them then it allows them to be their authentic selves and allows for a transparent conversation and also you’re asking the employee for their feedback.

Tanya: You’re asking them to own a part of realizing their areas for opportunity improvement as well as asking them for their needs. That’s where you’re doing your homework, your pre-work if you will in finding out the needs, the likes, the passion of your employee. I hope that answers Ken’s question. That was a good one.

Sarah: All right, perfect. Thank you. Next question is coming from Brian. He wants to know what is the biggest difference between coaching and managing? It seems much of this involves good management, not coaching per se.

Tanya: Good question. The difference between coaching and managing. Managing sometimes in my experience lends itself to mostly transactional, managing process and people. You’re managing individuals or groups to a desired goal. Coaching, if you think about the term engagement, and I speak a lot about that in the webinar. I use that terminology intentionally because engagement says that there is a shared responsibility, a shared communication between you and your employee. Recall in the presentation where we asked that it not just be manager-led, that it is also a session that is employee centric where you’re allowing for the employee to share with you their desires and also what they think is best in terms of allowing them to reach their goals, how they work best.

Tanya: So, it’s not just you giving them here are your goals and your objectives and this is where we expect you to meet them by this date, but you’re helping them along the way to achieve those desired outcomes. You’re providing support, and you’re also receiving feedback as to how they think they’re doing. It’s also a good idea sometimes to allow for shared coaching where it’s not just one person coaching. Perhaps there are, especially in environments where we have matrix environments, there’s a lot of overlap across organizations, there’s an opportunity for learning from others and I often have used a model of shared coaching where it’s not just one, not just your immediate manager but there are others who have a stake in your success, so I’m hoping that also answers his question.

Sarah: All right, thank you. Let’s see, moving on. Next question, Mildred wants to know what is the difference between coaching and mentoring?

Tanya: Coaching and mentoring? Thank you, Mildred, for your question. A mentor, and everyone should have one or two, I see mentors as those individuals who are your supporters. They are there to help guide you and to provide feedback. A mentor is not necessarily someone who has a stake in your success, however your coach is someone who is the coach of your team, your group and your immediate coach is someone who’s there to help you with collective goals to help you with resources that you might need. I see a mentor as someone that you can confide in, that you can go to that would be of support and help not just with your current role but even looking forward, looking through a forward view.

Tanya: Sometimes a mentor is going to be, you choose mentors who will be transparent, direct, and honest with you regardless and they are someone that you can trust. Mentors should be those that you select to provide you with feedback and be of support and an advocate for you. I hope that answers your question.

Sarah: Wonderful, thank you. Let’s see, next question is coming from Stacy. Does this method work when addressing a superior or opposed to employees?

Tanya: Hi, Stacy. Yes. The method of coaching if you look at some of the principals around coaching, assessing, identify, brainstorming, asking the right questions, setting up action plans and revisiting the goals and your metrics, revisiting them on a consistent and timely basis, those are certainly techniques that you can use for your direct reports as well as someone who you work for. I would see those very same principals being able to incorporate those in both interactions.

Sarah: All right, wonderful. Thank you. It looks like we probably have time for just one more question and that question is coming from Brandi. How would you go about implementing a coaching program for multiple teams where employees are leading others?

Tanya: How would you go about implementing coaching for multiple teams where employees are leading others? They’re leading each other I think is the question. Am I correct, Sarah?

Sarah: Mm-hmm (affirmative), correct.

Tanya: So, again, the same way we just answered the question for Stacy. The techniques are the same. The uniqueness comes with the individuals and the goals that you have set up for each of the groups. You can use performance or action plans for both groups. I don’t think the differentiator would be because they are employees leading one another. It would be wise to do the same assessing, asking questions, seeking to understand, and also providing feedback on a routine and consistent basis so that everyone is aware and you’re able to course correct along the way should something fall out of line that you’re holding one another accountable and you’re also cheering each other along the way with the small wins and along the way with the big ones. So, I see it as technique specific that can be used for both groups for managers and employees and employees leading one another.

Sarah: All right, perfect. Thank you so much, Tanya. I know we probably, I’m gonna go ahead and scroll through that chat box and if we have any unanswered questions we’ll actually send those over to Tanya and she’ll answer them and then we’ll probably be sending those in an email and then posting them also on the blog with those answered questions so look out for that link in your email as well. Again, if you want to purchase Coaching Conversations go over to HRDQ store dot com for more information. Again, I apologize for some of the technical issues in the beginning of the webinar but you never know with these live events. So, Tanya, thank you so much again and would you just like to add any final thoughts before I just go ahead and wrap up then?

Tanya: Well, I thank you, Sarah, and thank you so much for all the different questions. They were great questions and I encourage any of you to please reach out to me directly. I’d love to hear from you. Thank you so much and good luck with your coaching conversations.

Sarah: All right, thank you, Tanya, again and everybody in the line. We appreciate your time and we hope you found today’s webinar informative. Thanks all, bye bye.

Tanya: Bye bye.