Throughout our lifetime we will experience conflict. Some conflicts will stem from simple misunderstandings, while others may be caused by conflicting values (which, by the way, are the most difficult to resolve).
Our emotions run hot in conflict situations which can make it difficult for us to communicate in a rational manner. Each side will take a stand for what they want, feeling that their needs are the right needs! In the end, no one wins.
When in a conflict you find yourself heading down this dead-end road here are a few techniques that may help you get to a win-win.
- Get clear on what you are really disagreeing about. Ask: What is it that they want? What do they think I want?
- Ask questions. Don’t be afraid to ask questions in a non-judgmental way. The intent is to gain a clearer understanding of the other person’s needs in this situation.
- Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Ask yourself, “What would I do if I were in their shoes?
- Brainstorm solutions. The intent is to find common ground. The win-win!
written by Alvina Peat
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